I hate to be misunderstood, hate to have this feeling that someone out there do not like me or is irritated by me.
I tried to please everyone that i know.. on my own expense.
I scarifice my stuffs.. So that people around me will be happy.
Its hurts me badly.
Even tho i know its not my fault and i shouldnt care that much..
Still.. being dislike is what i hate most.
I hope the misunderstanding will be settle soon.
If not i will never feel good. >.<

Anyone out there who hates me/dislike me.. i know i can never please you as you are holding grudges against me. Thank you for hating/disliking me and telling people how much you dislike/hate me.. for that i got to realise how many true friends i have.. how many people really cares for me.

But i do know.. there's more ppl who love me for who i am, more than those who dislike me. For that.. i thank you for being there for me, caring for me. To all my wonderful babes and hunks who stood by my side. Thank you. =) __________________________________________________

Today, babe and i had a conversation.. she suddenly talk about marriage.. and how a sacred thing becomes something so.. easily taken for granted.. Everyone.. just married and divorce so easily. Marriage is no longer a one time thingy. Is it because woman now are getting smarter and more capable.. that they do not need to rely on man anymore? Things are no longer like the older days.. where.. woman have to depend on their man.. Is it because.. man and woman have more choices now?.. there no faithfulness or commitment for both sides? Is it because.. it has become a trend now?.. Divorce.. 3rd party.. love.. commitment.. trust.. marriage.. Oh well. packs of lies.
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I wish to have a friend like myself. who will go all the way out for a friend.
I am simply sick and tired of organising my bd parties.
Why dont i get a thoughtful friend who will organise my birthday party? =(
Dont think i will ever be so lucky to get a friend like myself.
Dont ask me who is going or who is not going.
If you wan, go, if you dont feel like it, then dont go.
Dont treat it as if it is a favour.
Its just a normal gathering, and it happens to be my birthday thats all.
If you feel that its not worth to go down, then dun go. i dont need fake appearance.
at least, now i know who cares for me. ah.. birthdays are so troublesome.
I wish i could be independent enough to stay home.
Do not need anyone beside me.


**SIGH**
*I am such a fool*

PS: Thanks Wayne, for being kind enough to help me organise an outing with my neighbours tomorrow. Sorry i am having my papers. thus unable to organise anything. but thanks alot. appreciate your thoughtfulness. =)
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"thank you for standing beside me."