Thinking back, i realise babe's wedding was the 4th time i was "invited" to be the jiemei/bridemaid.

1st - my 4th aunt wedding when i was 16

2nd - Celia jie wedding 2 years ago.

3rd - my youngest aunt wedding last mth

4th - Pris wedding this mth

Someone mention to me yesterday that there's a myth that a person cannot be a bridemaid for more that 3 times. Is it true?

*sigh*

Looking at quite a few of my friends getting married.. (through their pictures updated in friendster) i was kinda ..... sad for myself? feeling pathetic for myself? loss?

i dunno.

questions like..will i ever ever meet the man of my dreams?..will i ever ever be able to walk down the aisle?..

will appear in my brain.

Sometimes i wonder.. Have i been a bad kid that god has to... keep that man away from me for so long?

or... its not time for me yet?

I will keep persuading myself, i'm still young, i'm not ready.

I'm just tired of bumming around relationships after relationships.

I'm just feeling.. down.

I do not mean that i would want to rush. As i have also seen, couples getting divorce as and when they feel like it...

For now.. its just an empty feeling when u see friends around your age getting married.

and the fear of being left on the shelf..

and.. the fear of reaching the big number "3" and yet u are still unwanted.

few years back i was still sweet 18.

now?! MY GOD.. going to 23 liao leh~~

Tell me how not to worry when i have not even met the one that i would wanna lock my life with... =(

i see friends being together with their bf/gf for years. i see happiness shown on every of their pictures. if i say i dun envy them, i'm lying. lol. Yes, you can say, they will have their own problems. So what? At least, they have been through up's and down's together for so many years. and its a matter of time before they tie the knot right?..

ME DUN WAN TO BE THE OLD HAG LA~..

when char bor dun get married, they tend to be paranoid when they grows old.

I met a few liao lor.. Becoz of loneliness... =(

How how how?! I am not ugly, neither am i fat, neither am i looking for brad pitt as my hubby.

eh, dun say i siao wor.. if u think that i'm still too young to think of all these..

then when is not young? in another 2 years time, i'll be 25.. another 5 more years.. 28..

time flies de lor..

bah...

haiz.. i think i gave up hope liao. I might never be able to meet the one.

nvm! If i am to remain single, I will be a modern old hag. with lots of money to shop and tour around the world! *grinz*

tonight, i'm officially paranoid. =X